He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in
the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress, my
God, in whom I trust.
OK - today was one crazy day!! God is taking me on this journey, and I trust completely that He is walking every step of the way with me. I am learning so much, and gaining such an understanding and insight into what so many people live with day in and day out. Today started with an hour long drive to have an MRI done STAT, so that I could walk away with the films and a report. The purpose - the surgeon was really hoping that the foreign "masses" on the liver were hemangiomas, and that all of this worrying was needless. The MRI let us know that there are actually 3 masses instead of 2, and they are indeed tumors. The MRI took 90 minutes - I know - not a big deal, but it was - I just wasn't prepared at all mentally for the whole process - and if you know me at all, then you know that being perfectly still for 90 minutes was exhuasting, no music - AGHHHHH! But it's over, and we know more than we did yesterday. A friend who has walked this path, drove in from Jacksonville to spend the day with me. What a gift!! Another friend shared the scripture above, another friend brought dinner over - I still really struggle with being on the receiving and accepting gracefully end of this - it is foreign territory for me. So pray for David because he has the waiting to do tomorrow, pray for steady hands for the surgeon, and patience for me. Pray that God will continue to bless me with the good health that I have taken for granted for years. I can make the deal to turn on the treadmill when this is all over....but no deals necessary, I know that my God answers prayers, and I know that the prayer warriors are working overtime!! So dear friends, thank you in advance for your prayers that cover tomorrow!!
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
A friend sent me that scripture in the wee hours of this morning. It is that scripture that rolled around in my brain and spirit all morning - it is that scripture that God heard today in constant prayer from this crazy southern YaYa. No details needed - but not good news from the CAT scan that was mentioned in the last post. Our doctor actually came over to the house on Saturday to talk to us about the results. So yesterday was spent gathering records, films, etc - today God provided a wonderful lady - friend of a friend - who was able to put me in ahead of everyone else at 7 this morning to have a very indepth mammogram. I know what the doctors were expecting - guess what - my little bitty "girls" are CLEAN!!! SURPRISED?? not really - because I know who is in charge here. After that we were off to breakfast and hanging in the bookstore - great opportunity to buy babybooks to send to NC...at noon another meeting with a surgeon - found out I need an MRI tomorrow with the results before Friday am - this began to seem like an impossible task - my doctor's office got to work on it, and kept hitting walls - no one could do it - then a rep that was in the office overheard the conversation - he was there to let them know about his company - a diagnostic center not far away - he made a call, made arrangements for the MRI first thing in the morning...wow, how did that happen...SURPRISED??? - not really - because I know who is in charge here!! So today was exhausting - especially starting these days without even a cup of coffee - now, really, how are people supposed to funtion like that!?! So I am thanking God for answered prayers today, thanking all of the wonderful friends who have been calling and praying, and I am praying for all of the folks that I sat in waiting rooms with today.
Saturday, May 26, 2007
SURPRISE #4 - I come home to sleep after the SCAN due to being up all night drinking that nasty white liquid to make my insides glow - called David later to check in, and when you have been together for over 30 years - you know immediately when something is wrong - the company that he has been with for the past 13 years (and loves working for) had been sold that morning. This will probably change so many things for us - life now, daily work, future plans, retirement, benefits, etc. At this point - we know nothing, there are three regional meetings this week with the employees to answer our questions. Problem - David has a new plant starting up - no meeting in Baltimore for him!!
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Who knows we may even figure out where we want to live in 5 years.....gotta pack!!!
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
I don't even know where to start with this blog - I am so disappointed in some things around here...
first - Saturday evening we were coming home from having a Mother's Day dinner early, we pulled up to the intersection, there was a local pizza delivery car - i recognized the sign on top as being a pizza place owned by someone i know - the car was covered in rude and crude bumper stickers, and then on the driver's door - written in sharpie marker were messages with the "F word". Now, I am not a prude or easy shock at all, but this really lit a match under me - I called the phone number on top of the car, and asked to speak to a manager - he got on the phone, and after I very calmly explained what I was reading, he acknowledged that he knew exactly which car it was, and couldn't believe that this was a problem for me - I hadn't even ordered pizza, and I was probably one person out of a million that would be offended by what I was reading - CLICK!!!!! I emailed my friend who owns this company - no response yet....sad, sad, sad
then I am even more disappointed in myself - I thought I really had a handle on my "rush to judgement" problem...last week I pulled into the parking lot at church to pick up the Beth Moore dvds for our new Bible Study - out of the corner of my eye - I caught a glimpse of a window decal on a car - it said something about "body piercings" all I could think of was what kind of representation is that on someone's car that probably works for the church....blah, blah, blah, ...then on my way out, I thought I am looking at that again - try and figure out whose car that is...OK, did I get the wake up call - did I get hit in the face with shame and feeling ugly ugly - what the decal said was - Body Piercings Saved My Life - with a body "pierced to a cross" AGH!!!! the ugly, judgemental me had surfaced - I hate this, and I am so very, very sorry for being so quick to think the worst of someone....
BUT God is just so good - the Beth Moore group met for the 3rd time last night. This eclectic group of women is growing weekly. It is a precious group of women who God has called together "for such a time as this".
I am going through some medical issues right now, and really need to pray for patience in dealing with this - dealing with a diagnosis and being able to move on. I am such a "just do it now" person, and this is so tough for me. I know that I am making several wonderful doctors crazy!!!! So please pray for that if you are reading this.
I am just counting the days until this Thursday, when David and I leave for a long-awaited weekend away together.
And...most of all today - I am so excited - I have miraculously lost between 15-20 pounds!!!! Thanks Maggie!!
Friday, May 11, 2007
then David just comes in and asks me - "Think about it - what do you want your days to be like in 10 years?" woa...
this is what i wrote...
the perfect day - wow, that just takes off in so many different directions - i think that because of the many facets of my ordinary life - so there would or could be several perfect days BUT right now...
this may sound strange to some folks, but right now - today would be more than perfect if Guillermo, an incredible 4th grader who recently moved here from Puerto Rico, walked through the door this afternoon - and when we began to work on spelling and writing - he would be able to write just one 5 sentence paragraph without a struggle for letters and words. This child is brilliant, but getting it from his brain through his arm out through his hand and fingers onto a piece of paper or even a computer screen is a wall that we can't seem to climb over right now.
another most perfect day would be simple - a beach, my chair, a glass of iced tea, a great novel, and my oldest kindred spirits on either side of me. one is several states away, one is watching from Heaven
another perfect day, and I have had so many of these - my husband/best friend, my 2 daughters and my son-in-law, Walker - the dog(well maybe not, since he doesn't quite weigh 5 pounds I think he would blow out of the boat)...racing down the river in the boat - sun shining, water spraying, headed to the marsh and time for shrimping,crabbing and sun...true perfection!!
another perfect day - just a little more time to spend with my mother who is still around, or a day with my daddy or father-in-law who have been gone too long...
a day in the near future I hope - waking up and knowing that David and I don't have to go to WORK, that our day can be spent helping someone, going to Africa, rescuing turtles, or running a session of Camp Granny YaYa
another perfect day - a doctor notifying me that a cure - not just a rescue treatment - had been found for my daughter's daily migraines -
...this is an incredible way to look at what is really important in your life..
Thursday, May 10, 2007
It's Mother's Day - and this year more than others I find myself thinking of my own mother. I have always thought of my mom as the original "Steel Magnolia" - it's what we love, admire and respect so much!!
Soooo - looking up the definition of steel magnolia:
This IS who my mom! She is 85 years old...
steel magnolias are know for their beauty, grace and charm as well as their resourcefulness and inner strength."
- still drives,
- teaches Sunday School,
- works in the prayer room at her church - which she has computerized,
- she still goes to art class and paints -
- she is painting a portrait of my youngest daughter,
- she IMs with me on the computer,
- does her banking and billpaying online,
- she cuts her grass with a push-mower, bags it up and hauls it to the road,
- she had been taking care of her sister one day a week until her recent death,
- she drives her friends to their doctor appts,
- she cooks and takes food for funerals of friends (at this age it is a weekly occurrence)
- she has come back from a broken hip two years ago (due to climbing up on a piece of furniture) - her attitude was that a new hip should be much better than the old one she had -
- she has been widowed twice - my dad, the love of her life, died unexpectedly when I was 13, and she was only 47.
- She raised my younger sister and I by herself - sent both of us to college.
- Her own mother was killed in an accident when she was only 8 years old.
- She lived through my dad spending years overseas during WWII, several of those not knowing what was going on with him after a serious injury.
- She lived through my older brother spending three years in VietNam.
She has such inner strength! And where does that come from? Her FAITH! Her lifelong belief in her God and Christ.
She has spent so much of her life on her knees praying for me and my family, my sister and her family, my brother and his family.
Her Bible is worn and full of notes...years of faith and believing the promises.
Several weeks ago, she attended the Beth Moore conference with my daughters and I. I am sure she was one of the oldest women out of that group of 17,000 women. It was difficult for her to climb up and down the steps of the Carolina Center, but she did it - THE BLESSING OF SHARING THIS WITH THREE GENERATIONS WAS BEYOND MEASURE!!!
So on this Mother's Day, I thank my God for the gift of Miss Pearl aka: MeMe aka: MeMaw, a true steel magnolia, and I pray to my God that I may one day be just half the steel magnolia that she is!!!